Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Because You Suck: Chapter 18: Part 8

WARNING: This following scene (after the italic font) is graphic (NC-17!)
If you're curious but don't want to read it, the low-down is that Zach is frustrated at the business-like relationship (and sex) he has with Mikey. But Gentry isn't the solution... he's part of the problem!

“You know; I have a bed.”
“I know. But I wanna fuck you here.”
“Fine, I’ll let you.”
Zach groaned inwardly.
He knew what that meant… that afterwards, Mikey would roll back and limply demand his turn, because he never gave anything for free. A part of Zach was sickened by this unwritten “one for one” rule— of politely going along with sexual kinks rather than desiring them. Like the plush pig, letting someone use your body was a gift which upset a very delicate balance of control. And since he didn’t like owing anybody anything, Zach strove to maintain a positive balance.
Though occasionally… he wished he could stop thinking about it.
“Who said anything about letting?” he murmured, snapping the waistline of Mikey’s boxers down. Mikey jumped slightly, then went rigid as they were abruptly yanked down, and the cold air swept over his rigid sex.
“What if I just wanted to fuck you?” Zach pushed him against the sink, covering those blank white hands with his own, pressing the reddened palms to the marble countertop, “Don’t you want it?”
“Please don’t call it fucking---“ Mikey sighed, “it’s making love. Say it after me.”
Zach made a face and pulled away. He couldn’t stand those kinds of terms, not from anyone, not even—
“Turn around,” He said dryly, “and lean against the sink.”
Mikey spun to face him, and grinned a little as he leaned back with his elbows propped up on the marble counter. He impishly watched Zach slide to his knees, and inhaled sharply when those strong, dark fingers gave his erection a firm tug, and rubbed his thumb over the damp opening. Mikey’s stomach quivered and he grunted in pain, arching his back as Zach’s palm rubbed over the head of his weeping erection, and down the shaft. Slowly, deliberately. There was nothing teasing in his strokes, just his steady hand and firm strokes that came with it.
Above all things, it was consistant.
Zach approached sex the same way he approached everything else: thoroughly. But a grudging part of him was aware that this was not the same as homework… when he had sex, he actually got something out of it.
His tongue darted out over the heated skin, swirling around the swollen head.
Yet, some days, fucking Mikey felt more like servitude— Zach often found himself going through a checklist. Kissed? Check. Fingered? Check. Came? All right, A+.
Zach kissed his tip, and sucked it between his lips.

“Mm… Gods, Zach…”

But it would be illogical to have a boyfriend if you weren’t attracted to them. And Mikey was, by definition, a good boyfriend: he never hit him, never cursed, had a nice smile and held his hand when they walked to class.
“…don’t stop... Gods!”
Yeah. Mikey was a nice guy, Zach reasoned.
Though niceness aside, he preferred to fuck him from behind; shoving his face down so that he could fantasize…
Close his eyes and picture that robust body… battered yet intimidating, with its broad shoulders and powerful arms… the arched curve of his back and limbs which tensed from the slightest of touches. The sharp smell of chlorine and the dampness of his skin, the way his fine red hair stuck to it when he sweat.

Then it got good… real good.

Zach closed his eyes and started to thrust faster, a moment strained by Mikey’s plea:
“Fuck… pull out, you’re starting to leak.”
Zach jolted back to reality and pulled out, then irritably fell back against the door with crossed arms. Mikey cursed.
“Fuck. Too late. Quick, hand me a towel.”
Zach stiffly pulled it off the rack and dropped it into his hands.

Monday, July 28, 2008

Because You Suck: Chapter 18: Part 7

Note: Thanks for the support and feedback! It makes my day.

He went home after practice that day, and saw Mikey quickly kiss Zach goodbye.
That ass wasn’t good enough for him. If Zach would have found himself a decent boyfriend, that would have been another story. Zach needed someone he could grind up against, not this pussy.
This guy—
Whatever. There was no use complaining. Zach would just keep doing what he needed to do, no matter how baffling that was. Fine.

Zach climbed into his mother’s car, giving Mikey a small wave goodbye. Mikey grinned, then spotted Gentry while turning to leave in the other direction.

He had always been baffled by this choice… Of all people, why a closeted freckle monster? Mikey decided he was a much better choice, since he was intelligent and sensetive, not a thick-skulled jock. What Zach had ever found in that lump of boy Mikey found downright baffling.

Their eyes met across the courtyard.
And it was at that moment that Mikey decided to ruffle his feathers, so he winked at him.

Gentry said nothing; he just turned and walked to the crossing, waiting right by the bus stop.
When Mikey passed, he shoved him into a bush.

Friday, July 25, 2008

Because You Suck: Chapter 18: Part 6

Gentry parted his lips. But no words came out.
Zach waited for an answer, wide blue eyes aimed at him.
But he didn’t have one, so he simply said,
“If you don’t want to cheat, fine. But it will be harder.”
Zach sunk into his seat, weary-eyed at the realization of what he’d just insisted on. Learning a year’s worth of lit in the last weeks of school? Probably impossible.
Colleges would never ask about it or care to know, but there was still life outside school... beyond Handson. There were times when you just had to take setbacks into account. In this case, it came with the territory.
No one said he had to be happy about it.
Gentry gave a wry half-smile, and nudged Zach’s leg with his foot.
“How’d you survive middle school?”
“…I was homeschooled.”
Gentry nodded slowly.
That figured.
He privately decided that Zach was a lot like a tree. You either moved around it or chopped it down, but it wouldn’t bend like a reed no matter how hard the storm. At worst, he would end up a big old stump; cut down to size and worn down. He would be chopped to pieces, used for his raw material... his honor, his hard working nature, his sympathy. But even then, he would still be there, believing in what he believed in.
And deep in his gut, Gentry respected him for it.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Because You Suck: Chapter 18: Part 5

Note: Thank you for the feedback! I promise, the next few chapters won't be filled with this much bickering. This part just had to be written or it wouldn't get out of my head. It's long because the effect dies if I chop it into sections ^_^.

When the silence became too comfortable, Zach shot it dead.
“I’m halfway through the book.” He announced in a very serious voice, taking his seat opposite Gentry, “At this rate, I’ll be caught up in two days.”
The serious voice didn’t impress Gentry. He had seen that smile; he was not fooled for a second.
You like me, you son of a bitch. You can’t help it.
He kept an equally serious silence and thoughtfully sunk back into his chair; taking a deep breath, then nodding slowly in approval.
He wordlessly reached into his folder, drew out a manila folder, and slid it across the table. Zach caught it apprehensively, quickly glanced it over, then asked,
“What’s this?”
“Handson’s final.”
“…I’m not supposed to have this.”
Gentry gave a little smile, and answered softly, “Consider it a gift.”
“I’m not taking this.” Zach declared firmly, shoving it back over the table.
Gentry leered at him in disbelief, then pushed it back with the level reminder, “Do you know the trouble I went through to get this?”
“I don’t care; I’m not taking it. I never cheated, and I’m not going to start now.”
“You cheated on your so-called boyfriend.”
“That’s different,” Zach admitted defensively, “And piling on wrongs never made a right.”
“Handson’s cheating you out of your grade.”
“Fight fire with fire.”
“Water can’t become fire--- It’s not me.” Zach exhaled angrily, and devoutly insisted, “I’m not going to cheat, because it’s wrong.”
Gentry sat up in his chair.
“You know what’s wrong?” he asked spitefully, raising himself to his feet and cirling the table, “School is wrong. Handson didn’t help you find a group. He just deducted points wherever he could.”
Beneath the logical argument simmered a note of resentment. He looked so hateful; A pile of sour intent which spoke each word as if it had happened to him, and had left a mark deep underneath his skin. Beneath the firm, weary-voiced intonation there was a latent disgust bubbling through to the surface, a long-held acidity which strained his features into a dry frown when he finished talking. He stopped pacing and glanced at Zach; his brooding gaze dared Zach to reply, so reply Zach did.
“I don’t like Handson, but that doesn’t change that I also fucked up.” he argued, “I should have been in Kylie’s group when he gave me the chance. I didn’t want to because he’d grade us harder… that was a mistake. But I still should have done the Romeo and Juliet assignment. I could have worked better---”
“You could have. And he could teach instead of torture.” Gentry replied heatedly. “He expects you to reach a standard so he can get paid, but he doesn’t want to do any of the teaching that will get you to that standard. So he grades you down if you don’t make it. You’re a crappy lit student, Zach. But you’re not an F.”
“It doesn’t matter what the hell I am or not! The percentages add up, even if the guy adding them is Handson. And I can’t cheat just because he cheated. Any way you look at it, a bunch of wrongs still don’t make a right.”
“The Right way isn’t always the Best way. Don’t you want to survive?”
“Who doesn’t! But I don’t want to survive as a cheater. It sets the wrong standard.”
Gentry moved behind him and slid his arms around his shoulders.
“Standards, hm? When I was in the office, I saw Kylie had a B+, and you had an F. We both know the grade doesn’t fit; is it really worth sacrificing your summer over? A dog could have earned the same grade with less effort.” he murmured in his ear, “You know… I went through a lot to get that Final. Try being thankful.”
Zach pulled out of his grasp, and exhaled loudly.
“I don’t want it, Gentry!”
He quietly reasoned that if any teacher could expect cheating in their class, it was Handson: That arrogant motherfucker with his 89.7%’s, an incompetent online-worksheets printing bozo who always left early, and graded you down for the color of your ink. Fucking A… Yet, on the other hand, if that logic were applied to shooting people, well… The fact was that Zach had never cheated nor shot anyone.
“That F will follow you throughout your school career.” Gentry said after a moment’s uncertain silence, in response to the wavering doubt which played over Zach’s face. Yet he didn’t look up.
“Do you want to get into a good college? Because colleges will look at it and judge your potential as a human being, only that F isn’t you. The only reason you have it is because you have too much academic integrity.”
Gentry taunted him with such conviction that Zach cynically wondered if he was trying to validate his own actions. He rested his cheek on one fist and warily peered across the table, to where Gentry has resumed his seat.
“You have to do what you have to do, otherwise people will do you.” He leaned in to stress with a slow-drawled, “Understand?”
“Then that’s your defect. If you don’t fight for yourself, no one will. Do you want to keep failing for the rest of your life? Everybody cheats. Learn it already.” Gentry exhaled in a low sigh, evidently frustrated as he continued,
“If you want to save your grade, go to Handson tomorrow and tell him that you were too involved in the GSA; that you were helpless, confused, and trying to find yourself--- and because of that, you didn’t try as much as you should have. Tell him you’ve changed.”
“--- I haven’t---”
“That doesn’t matter. It’s only words; so tell him you take full responsibility for your mistakes, but you want another chance on the Romeo and Juliet assignment. Or, a make-up assignment. Then walk away dejectedly when he turns you down. Badger him whenever you turn in an assignment. The next assignment you turn in will get a C-, so it won’t look suspicious when you get B’s on the others. Make sure to thank him for the C, and tell him you studied a lot. Ask him what else you can do. Then, for the rest of the weeks until the end of the year, wear your ugliest sweater. Don’t look too hot, and drink a lot of sugar water; Look tired and worn out so he’ll believe you when you say how much you’ve been studying.”
“You should be judged on merits and work, not sugar water. This is all bullshit---”
“Handson is bullshit.”
“But it’s not right---”
“So why should you be?”
“Because you can’t criticize someone if you aren’t better than them! I can’t just support their behavior by giving in.”
“You also can’t criticize them if you flunk high school.” Gentry raised his voice and his eyes, “High school isn’t about how smart you are, how creative you are, or how you stick to your guns. Guns are illegal here. The only thing you learn in high school is bullshitting, and if you want to make a difference in the world you shut up when you need to, otherwise you go down early. That’s what Handson’s trying to do; He wants to destroy you before you have a chance to accomplish anything. And he has the power to; unless you beat him at his own game.”
Gentry’s raving proclamation ended in dry silence. When he didn’t mumble, he had a strong voice, ripe with conviction. It was a voice which inspired understanding and above all, faith.
Faith forged from distrust, knowing that nothing could be relied on except for disappointment and domination. That teachers were only human, and it was every man for himself— and the moment you accepted that as your gospel, you knew that you could only rely on yourself to get what you wanted.
Nothing else mattered— The body and mind were only survival tools.
But then…
there was no way to justify something like this, there was no compromise here he could live with. After all, it only took one missing brick to crumble a wall. To some people cheating meant nothing, but not for him. Was a belief worth a grade? A summer? A lifetime? Were beliefs worth anything at all? He didn’t need to think twice.
Enough was enough. Zach rubbed his sweaty palms on his arms, and spoke up without wavering,
At the end of the table, his favorite rival looked up with smoldering eyes, watching with great interest as the emotions played out over his face. Probably wondering why he never felt them, and why this was such a difficult choice. The window behind his head filtered sunlight through the blinds, which lit his red hair and glinted across his eyes.
“Can you tell me one thing?” asked Zach, tense as the air.
“When does the bullshiting end?”

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Because You Suck: Chapter 18: Part 4

Note: Thanks for the feedback ^_^. If you have written anything new, post a link in the comments section--- I always read and review!

When it came to pigs, Gentry preferred the stuffed variety.
The faggot had arrived with Mikey by his side, kissing him goodbye before pulling open the door and suavely sliding in. Things did not always add up for Gentry, though if there was one thing that was certain, it was that one way or another his feelings raced ahead of his judgement. So he fumed at first glance, tearing off the GSA poster taped to the library window. The tape clung to his fingers, while the other half of the poster remained stuck to the glass. With impatient distaste, he yanked both off and noisily crumpled the scraps into his palm before hurling them into the trash, minutes before Zach unceremoniously thrust the door open.

“Don’t bring that next time.”

It slammed behind him.
Zach jerked his head back and raised raised his eyebrows at Gentry’s sour expression, “What?”
“Your boy-friend.” Gentry grumbled, turning away. “And shove the attitude.”
“The only attitude here is yours.” Zach replied bluntly, taking his seat and setting his book on the table, “I’m not dumping Mikey just because you don’t like him… and I’ll bring him when I want to. You don’t own me.”
“Who’d want to own you?”
“Nothing.” Gentry scoffed dismissively, as if he could care less. “If you’re going to bring that fag here, then at least don’t suck face.”
“All right.”
“Finished the book?”
“---You know, straights make out in public all the time, and no one says anything.”
“Yeah, and gays can be trashy too. You made your point.”
Zach fell silent.
“So. Can we change the subject?” Gentry’s mumbly grumbly voice still simmered with agitation, “Your essay---”
“You’re really the last person who should be bashing PDA.”
“Public Displays of Affection.”
“That wasn’t affection.” Gentry scoffed, “It was public display of affliction. He was mauling your face, and it was disgusting to watch.”
“You were watching?”
Gentry peered back at him, and shrugged unapologetically.
“Feh." said Zach, "You probably had your face to the glass--- I’m not surprised though. The only thing I’m surprised at is how self-rightous and offended you are. Really, coming from you! You can’t even have sex in bed like a normal person.”
“Yeah, so?” Gentry drawled with a note of resentment, “I like public sex. But not when Mikey’s attempting it.”
“…Just when you’re doing it.”
“I do it better.”
“Then you’re hypocritical and jealous.” Zach said in the matter-of-fact way a doctor delivered a diagnosis, or a news reporter covered the forecast. Then he sharply took out his pencil and clicked it repeatedly, ignoring the ground-levelling look Gentry aimed at him.
“Jealous?” he echoed, as if surprised, “Of what?”
“You like me.”
“Not as much as I dislike him. He kisses like a human vacuum cleaner.”
“You wouldn’t know, you’re not kissing him.”
“Yeah. And it’s a good thing, too. It looks painful.”
That couldn’t be resisted.
Gentry was a trooper, all right. He didn’t dole it out if he couldn’t take it.
Despite himself, Zach smiled.

Sunday, July 6, 2008

Because You Suck: Chapter 18: Part 3

Note: Sorry for the late update! 4th of July got crazy.

The Save the Congo poster was prominently displayed on the door, the pride of the Greek teacher (who had never visited Africa on account that Hawaii was a better place to vacation.) Zach stared back into the eyes of the skinny black kid in the photo, wondering if he was really from the Congo or just selected on the basis of looking pathetic.
In the background Mikey’s smoky voice hummed on, smoothly conversing with the Greek teacher:
“I thought that was a great story. Greek culture is fascinating to me.”
“Yes, and the translator for this edition is good. He also translated The Aenid.”
“Yeah… oh, isn’t that by Virgil?”
“Yes, you’ve read it?”
“I read excerpts of it… on my own, since I’m considering to study abroad in Greece someday. I gained a lot from reading The Aenid… it was very interesting, now I can see why the Greeks are so respected. In fact, it inspired me to see Zorbas the Greek.”
“Zorbas! What a great film…”
“---Yeaaah. I really related to it. It brought over the richness of Greek culture…”
Zach stood by the door and watched, one foot arched inwards and head slung to one side--- Bored within an inch of life. Mikey had been talking to the AP Lit teacher for what felt like eternity, showering her with enough compliments to leave her smelling freshly seduced.
“You’re into Greek culture? Since when?” Zach thought to himself.
But he grudgingly contended that you did what you had to. Grades were Your Future, and it wasn’t right to impose into anyone’s future. That defied the rule of free will, and not even God had the right to do that. Still, Zach privately designated this boot-lickery as prime rate bullshit.
“Yeah, I’m even considering to take Greek next year.”
“Are you? Then you should know there are two classes. Greek One and Greek Literature…”
“Which one are you teaching?”
After fifteen minutes of mutual admiration of the wonderful contributions of the Greeks to mankind, Mikey hugged her goodbye and trailed out the door with Zach at his side.

“Wow,” Zach said, unable to hide his un-enthusiasm, “you really love Greek culture.”
“Well, we can learn a lot from the Greeks.”
“Like flattery?”
“Hey now, don’t get cute. I meant generally. They’re as classic as Shakephere.”
“Shakesphere’s old. That’s all classic means. Old. And the only thing old things are good for is being replaced by new ones.”
Mikey just smiled, “Hey. Why don’t you show up to GSA meetings anymore?”
Zach smoldered in silence, wishing Mikey would have told him “What are you saying? That’s crazy.” Sometimes he flung stupid things at him on purpose, just to get a reaction. And when none came, it riled him. Other times, he wished Mikey would hit him. Hard. Tell him he was worthless and then storm off and go fuck some other guy. At least then he’d have a reason to hate him, rather than just rely on a vague feeling of uneasiness in his gut. There was something wrong, but what? Nothing, and that didn’t make any sense.
Zach grudgingly became aware that Mikey was still staring at him, patiently waiting for an answer. With evident hesitation, Zach dug his hands into his pockets and gawked forward, turning Mikey’s question over in his brain.
“You want to know why I don’t show up to meetings?” he heatedly thought to himself, wondering how to translate the disgust he had such a hard time rationalizing into coherent wording. But the silence went on too long, so he just shrugged thoughtlessly and replied, “I’m busy.”
“With what?”
The Spanish teacher wobbled by on her way to the office, ass up in the air. Zach watched her go, the words “like a bitch in heat” sparking in his mind. He casually wondered if a dog in suit was still a dog. Then he turned to Mikey and asked,
“How’s the GSA presidency thing going?”
“I’m glad you asked. It’s a very rewarding experience.”
“It looks good on a college app.” added Zach, somewhat listlessly.
“Yeah, it does. But I’m not just doing it for that--- I really care about the GSA.”
“Well, you’re gay. Figures.”
“Yeah. But hey,” Mikey smiled wanly, “you’re gay too. Drop by if you ever have time, we have some new posters that need to be hung up.”
“I’d rather not.”
“Hah, well, every little bit helps our cause. So, Zach. After Nationals is over… are you going with anyone to the Prom?”
“No.” Zach paused, then turned to him and levelly added, “But you want to ask me, right?”
“Yep. No one in the history of Kennedy High has ever brought another guy as a date to the prom.” Mikey grinned, “What do you say?”
“All right.”
“Sweet. Oh… wait.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a woven bracelet, “I was thinking about you in in Art this morning. It’s prom colors… Just so you remember.”
Zach wordlessly let Mikey raise his hand and tie the blue-on-white-on-gray bracelet above the GSA one, and murmured a thanks when he pulled away.
“You’re welcome. Bye Zach.”
“Bye.”Mikey grinned and pulled Zach back, biting his shoulder then kissing him heatedly.